::cliffsnotes:: / Tuesday, November 08, 2005
However wonderful, i believe, life is still not ideal. It's isn't (yet) perfect. And the main problem? It's us people. The society. Because of our behaviour and attitude to different things in life, we don't make it perfect. If you want your fate to change, first change your attitude. Let me give you some examples of different, let's say, values (if you rather call it). Here i am not pin-pointing anybody, while reading my post, it is definitely allowed for your mind to drift elsewhere.
Forgiveness. Unfortunately, today's society isn't that forgiving. But of course, i believe that everybody is trying to but are stuck in the middle of the rubber band. The tension of opposites. Take for instance, ex-convicts and employers. Singapore wants to show itself as a forgiving and compassionate country. Well, no matter how strong the government persuades employers to take in ex-convicts, employers will certainly would not budge because they already have a stereotyped mind of the ex-convicts. This leads me to the point of yin and yang, girl and boy. Both of them worked very well together (this society....) so why can't us? Different parties work together might be able to get up with something worthy. However small, such as gratitude, is a by-product for working together well. So why not do that, and make life a better place? Don't treat it as a negative item just because it isn't ideal. It's your everything. Once you give it up, you're gone. Life doesn't come by naturally perfect, it is your job to make your life perfect.
I'm trying to keep this post as casual as ever but if there's any deep thoughts around here, umm..please don't charge me for plagarism cos i really did not copied it from somewhere. Just a little boast: i'm a guru of life. ok, whatever you say....LET'S CARRY ON.
Death. Many people think that Death is a scary thing. Someone holding a sith in the hand, coming to collect one's soul, is definitely horrifying. Some people welcome death, whether in a positive way or what not. Of course, seeing Death drag someone to her cave is not that great either. When you learn how to die, you learn how to live. When you are aware of Death, you will be more involved in your daily life. do it the way the Buddhists do. Ask the Little Bird. Is it today? Have i done enough? Have i done the things i ought to do? You pioritise and learn how to live.
Emotions. This would be the last. My thoughts never seem to stop. Um..this has some connection to my previous post on "fusion". It was real (the emotions then), i'm just linking it back. I said something on detaching. Here's it.
Everyone must learn to detach from things. We can't cling on to things forever, as they are impermanent. They change as you change. And feelings and emotions are the same. You can't always cling on to that thought forever - be it good or bad - like a koala bear. Detatchment....
If you hold back on your emotions, and don't let yourself penetrate you fully, you can never detach, becuase you're too busy being afraid. Afraid of the pain. Afraid of the grief. Afraid of the vulnarability that love entails. But by diving in, you experience them fully and completely. You eventually know what pain is, what love is. You recognise this emotion. You experience this emotion, and then you just say to yourself, it's time to detach from it for a moment.
When you're to experience an emotion that's not great...
You recognise this emotion (since you experience it before), the feel of it, the moisture, the texture. Once you confirm the emotion, you can say, "This is fear, not good, so step away from it. Step away. don't let it penetrate you once more.
Approach detector....
Turn on the water faucet and wash yourself with the emotion. Feel it spilling out, drenching you head to toe. Recognise and experience that feeling. Let the tears drop. Let the laughter out. If you let the fear inside, if you pulled the emotions on like an old shirt, you can just say, "Alright it's just fear, i don't have to let it control me. I see it for what it is." Then, you have overcome fear - of a big thing
Same for lonliness. You let go, let the tears flow (crying is good - full, fast relief), feel it completely. But eventually, you'd be able to say, " that was a short moment of lonliness, i'm not afraid of it anymore. But now, i'm gonna put it aside, and realise that there are other emotions in the world and i'm going to find and experience it as well.
I'm done with my post. Go on with what you're doing. Feel free to detach anytime you want if you feel that is getting bory or whatsoever. Grab a bite, if you are attracted, cos it's a real long post (is it not?) that need analysing and reflection. I mean, if you feel that there is a need. If you did surface reading, probably you don't do well for composition, or you just think that there's no marks to it. Philosophy dears, its gonna affect you for the whole life (in a good way, no?), so why not cultivate this habit from young?!
Oh! Why did i write the above paragraph for? It's the end of post, no more......right?
/ihopped at
1:29 AM
::pics:: / Friday, November 04, 2005
I don't post pictures on my blog often (i never do though). So this is my first time posting a photo. This is a studio photo. It's pretty obvious who's who in the picture. Basically, it's the whole family. I don't really fancy my photos because i seriously do not look photogenic. You can try taking a look at the CmPS photos on the NYPS website. I look horrid in the big windbreaker but, well, at least it kept me warm. Lolx. Well, have a good time and introduce this blog to your friends if you wish (of course, if you think it is nice. if not up to your satisfaction, don't introduce).
Post your comments if you wish to see more of such photos (i doubt so).
/ihopped at
4:45 AM
Yes people, I'm free!! I'm free from the exam jail mentally and physically. It's play and par-teh for me now. I'm not gonna worry for my marks, cos i know i'm not gonna do well (it's very true, i have this premonition. or rather "what-calvin-and-charles-have" feeling). I did not study much. what do you expect. well, i got a few results back but surprisingly, it was more than what i expected. I'm not going into exact marks. You know the rough idea and i guess, it's more than adequate.
O god. I absolutely LOVE this feeling. Think it that way if you want. I'm getting fineliner bursts almost everyday. If you know what i mean....what can i say, good for you. Ok i got into the details, i shoudn't have!!! i wanted to remain indirect but i guess it isn't doing any good for me. For being indirect, i minused 2 marks off my EL paper. Ack.
This week, we had loads of fun. When i say we, i mean me. Ok, i'm being stupid. I can't control. Alright on tuesday, which was a pubic (i'll tell you why later!! hahaha, i'm bursting!!!) holiday. LV, LYNN AND VANESS came to my house for a big party. Oh god, it was fun!!! I could remember almost everything we did. You know, you really should come to my house. It's lovely (ok, fine. i love my house, it's just a little boast.). Well and there are 2 things you'll be surprised at. You come to my house, i'll tell ya. But no doubt, many pple's houses are nice too. Including HDB's.
Well, i never look down on people who live in them. HDB's bring out the real Singaporeans. Love, care between families. In one small flat, people get closer to each other and understands each other needs. I mean, you stay in one big house and you keep far apart. What's the use even if you have money?? Money DOESN'T make the world go round. You don't buy love with it. You cultivate it. You practise it. You have it. It's either you are aware of it or you don't. You know what, Love wins. Love always win.
Speaking of values, i just want to ask what you define as selfish and self-centred. I believe that they are unwilling to help others because they are unwilling to give up some of their time. They don't want to help just for their own good. What is your perception of them? Here, i'm talking about the willingness to give up time to help others. Of course, the unwillingness to lend someone something is also considered as selfishness.
Ok, i'll leave this topic which will take me a day to finish it up. Well on Wednesday it was another sleepy day. I was bored and had nothing better to do. We gave back some results and it was ok. Well, for the whole day the only pen we ever used is the green one. Why, now my green pen's lost.
On thursday it was another pubic holiday (ahahhaha!! i can't help it). We met up in lee voon's house to practice lone dog. It was ok. I don't think is superb or anything. It's average - people, you have a good chance of winning.
Ok, after practicing, we went to play monopoly. That was the time when everybody was bursting into feats of laughter (do you know why the "fineliner bursts" now?). Lee Voon was the winner at first. And lynn went bankrupt after time and had to mortage her house. The reason lee voon was winning is because she bought alot of properties in the first round. And in the end, I was the one who got bankrupt. Even after getting into bankruptcy, i was heavily in debt that Lee Voon and Janet had to absorb for me. The debt was about 2K. Ack. Then, Lynn left. She left me the good properties she had. Hurrah for me!!!!!! I earned 2K+++ from her too. Yay me! Then Janet left. O, lucky me. she did exactly the same. I got the good houses!! Ooh yea. And as expected, lee voon landed on my 1K plus properties and lost to me her 4K++++. Wah, yu guo tian qing ah!!!
Friday, which is today was so funny. When we got back our SW, Matthias found out that he spelt "public" wrongly. Instead he spelt it as "pubic". Oh god, the meaning is a BIG difference. So now it explains why i wrote pubic in the last few paragraphs. After that, we got back a few results. It was so-so. We played cheat. You know what, after playing cheat for a few months back, i never dared cheated. Well, i did this time - for the sake of winning.
Basically, i had a fab week this time round, except for some sleepy mornings. And during those times, i was always called to carry out errands for my cmps group. For those who are unaware, you'll see me and the rest of the cmps pupils up on stage for a prize presentation (again?!?!) on Monday. I'm going to look, oh, all so ugly.
Ahhh, my teeth hurts after eating 8 guavas (hard ones of course). I think i'm gonna need the dentist!!! But the good thing is, i finished writing my post. Erm..further updates: The next post is going to be about advertisements (pronounced: ad-VER-tis-ment for LC). Guess it's gonna be an interesting one but is going to appear somewhat later. Oh yes, the idea is patent righted already. *stamped*
Countdown: 13 more days to my birthday.
/ihopped at
12:48 AM